Little Johnny Jokes

Little Johnny’s at it again……. A new teacher was trying to make
use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying,
‘Everyone who thinks they’re stupid, stand up!’ After a few seconds,
Little Johnny stood up.. The teacher said, ‘Do you think you’re
stupid, Little Johnny?’ ‘No, ma’am, but I hate to see you standing
there all by yourself!’

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Little Johnny watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream
on her face. ‘Why do you do that, mommy?’ he asked. ‘To make myself
beautiful,’ said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a
tissue. ‘What’s the matter?’ asked Little Johnny.. ‘Giving up?’

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The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn’t paying attention in
class. She called on him and said, ‘Johnny! What are 2 and 4 and 28
and 44?’ Little Johnny quickly replied, ‘NBC, FOX, ESPN and the
Cartoon Network!’

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Little Johnny’s kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local
police station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of
the 10 most wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a
picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person.
‘Yes,’ said the policeman. ‘The detectives want very badly to capture
him. Little Johnny asked, ” Why didn’t you keep him when you took his
picture ? ”

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Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as
his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down
the horse’s legs and rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Johnny
asked, ‘Dad, why are you doing that?’ His father replied, ‘Because
when I’m buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and
in good shape before I buy. Johnny, looking worried, said, ‘Dad, I
think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom ..’

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Tags: funny, Humor, jokes, Little Johnny