Funny Newspaper Headlines

Proofreading is a dying art, wouldn’t you say?

Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter

This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and called the Editorial
Room and asked who wrote this. It took two or three readings
before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!! !
They put in a correction the next day.

I just couldn’t help but sending this along. Too funny.

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says

No crap, really? Ya think?

——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ———
-

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

Now that’s taking things a bit far!

——— ——— ——— ——— ———

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over

What a guy!

——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——

Miners Refuse to Work after Death

No-good-for-nothing’ lazy so-and-so’s!

——— ——— ——— ——— ——

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

See if that works any better than a fair trial!


——— ——— ——— ——— ———

War Dims Hope for Peace

I can see where it might have that effect!

——— ——— ——— ——— ———

If Strike Isn’t Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile

Ya
think?!

——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— —–

Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures

Who would have thought!

——— ——— ——— ——— ———

Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide

They may be on to
something!

——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ———

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges

You mean there’s something stronger than duct
tape?

——— ——— ——— ——— ——— -

Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge

He probably IS the battery charge!

——— ——— ——— ——-

New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group

Weren’t they fat
enough?!

——— ——— ——— ——–

Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft

That’s what he
gets for eating those beans!

—————- ———— ——— ——— —

Kids Make Nutritious Snacks

Do they taste like chicken?

********* ********* ********* *

Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half

Chainsaw Massacre all over
again!

********* ********* ********* ********* ***

Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

Boy, are they tall!

********* ********* ********* ****

And
the winner is….

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

Did I read that right?

Tags: funny, Funny Newspaper Headlines, Humor, jokes