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	<title>Funny Emails &#187; Funny Forwards</title>
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		<title>Farm Boy Pranks</title>
		<link>http://www.eligr.com/2012/01/farm-boy-pranks/</link>
		<comments>http://www.eligr.com/2012/01/farm-boy-pranks/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 31 Jan 2012 21:36:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Funny Forwards]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Proof that you can never underestimate the innovativeness of American Farm Boys: At a high school in Iowa , a group of boy students played a prank. They let three goats loose inside the school. But before turning them loose, they painted numbers on the sides of the goats: 1, 2 and 4. School Administrators spent most of the day looking for No. 3. Now that&#8217;s funny, I don&#8217;t care who you are&#8230;..]]></description>
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		<title>Daddy&#8217;s Home Early</title>
		<link>http://www.eligr.com/2012/01/daddys-hom/</link>
		<comments>http://www.eligr.com/2012/01/daddys-hom/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 30 Jan 2012 17:08:35 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Funny Forwards]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[rriiiiinnnnggg, rrriiiinnnngg,** **&#8217;Hello?&#8217;** **&#8217;Hi honey.** **This is Daddy.** **Is Mommy near the phone?&#8217;** **&#8217;No, Daddy.** **She&#8217;s upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Gabe.&#8217;** **After a brief pause,** **Daddy says,** **&#8217;But honey, you haven&#8217;t got an Uncle Gabe.&#8217;** **&#8217;Oh yes I do, and he&#8217;s upstairs in the room with Mommy,** **Right now..&#8217;** Brief Pause. **&#8217;Uh, okay then, this is what I want you to do.** **Put the phonedown on the table, run upstairs** **And knock on the bedroom door and shout to Mommy** **That Daddy&#8217;s car just pulled into the driveway.&#8217;** **&#8217;Okay, Daddy, Just a minute.&#8217;** **A few minutes later** **The little girl comes back to the phone.** **&#8217;I did it, Daddy.&#8217;** **&#8217;And what happened, honey?&#8217; ** &#8216;Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming.** **Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser** **And now she isn&#8217;t moving at all!&#8217;** **&#8217;Oh my God!!! What about your Uncle Gabe?&#8217;** **&#8217;He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on, too.** **He was all scared and he jumped out of the back window** **And into the swimming pool..** **But I guess he didn&#8217;t know that you took out the water** [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Old Farmers Advice</title>
		<link>http://www.eligr.com/2012/01/old-farmers-advice/</link>
		<comments>http://www.eligr.com/2012/01/old-farmers-advice/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 29 Jan 2012 14:51:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Funny Forwards]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.eligr.com/?p=6833</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong. Keep skunks and bankers at a distance. Life is simpler when you plow around the stump. A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor. Words that soak into your ears are whispered…&#8230;not yelled. Meanness don&#8217;t just happen overnight. Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you. It don&#8217;t take a very big person to carry a grudge. You cannot unsay a cruel word. Every path has a few puddles. When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty. The best sermons are lived, not preached. Most of the stuff people worry about, ain&#8217;t never gonna happen anyway. Don&#8217;t judge folks by their relatives. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer. Live a good and honorable life, then when you get older and think back, you&#8217;ll enjoy it a second time. Don&#8217;t interfere with somethin&#8217; that ain&#8217;t bothering you none. Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance. If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin&#8217;. Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got. The biggest troublemaker you&#8217;ll probably ever have to deal [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Stuff You Didn&#8217;t Know</title>
		<link>http://www.eligr.com/2012/01/stuff-you-didnt-know/</link>
		<comments>http://www.eligr.com/2012/01/stuff-you-didnt-know/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 28 Jan 2012 14:48:17 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Funny Forwards]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.eligr.com/?p=6832</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;- Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the U.S. Treasury. &#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8211; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8211; Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better. &#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;- Coca-Cola was originally green. &#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;- It is impossible to lick your elbow. &#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;- The State with the highest percentage of people who walk to work: Alaska &#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;- The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28% (now get this&#8230;) &#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;- The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38% &#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212; &#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212; The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven: $ 16,400 &#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212; The average number of people airborne over the U.S. in any given hour: 61,000 &#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212; Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.. &#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212; The first novel ever written on a typewriter, Tom Sawyer. &#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8211; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8212;&#8212;&#8212; &#8211; The San Francisco Cable cars are the [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Bungee Jumping In Mexico</title>
		<link>http://www.eligr.com/2012/01/bungee-jumping-in-mexico/</link>
		<comments>http://www.eligr.com/2012/01/bungee-jumping-in-mexico/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 27 Jan 2012 20:00:35 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Funny Forwards]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.eligr.com/?p=6831</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Al and Joe are bungee-jumping one day. Al says to Joe, &#8220;You know, we could make a lot of money running our own bungee jumping service in Mexico.&#8221; . Joe thinks this is a great idea, so they pool their money and buy everything they&#8217;ll need: a tower, an elastic cord, insurance, etc. They travel to Mexico and begin to set up on the square. As they are constructing the tower, a crowd begins to assemble. Slowly, more and more people gather to watch them work. When they had finished, there was such a crowd they thought it would be a good idea to give a demonstration. Al jumps&#8230; he bounces at the end of the cord, but when he comes back up, Joe notices that he has a few cuts and scratches. Unfortunately, Joe isn&#8217;t able to catch him and he falls again, bounces again and comes back up again. This time he is bruised and bleeding. Al falls again and bounces back up. This time he comes back pretty messed up &#8212; he&#8217;s got a couple of broken bones and is almost unconscious. Luckily Joe catches him this time and says, &#8220;What happened? Was the cord too long?&#8221; [...]]]></description>
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